May Days 3. Doubt

It was only a matter of time before everyone got in the car with me. This morning all my friends showed up: self-criticism, doubt being the two I know best. It figures, I thought. now that I’m aware and watchful.  Likely they had been there all along, but now I can see them.

Doubt is a really challenging companion in my line of work. So much depends on identifying where God is at work. That naming demands that I be spiritually synced to some extent. Today the questions bombarded me: “Will I hear anything this morning? Will there be any insights to note? Am I molding God into a commodity?  A product I trade for my own purposes?”

Religion has a long, successful history of making God into our own image to serve our own purposes. When doubt and self-criticism joined me this morning it seemed the only thing to do was to engage them in dialogue. It’s the best way I have of keeping myself honest.

Day three I heard nothing but the voices in me. There are no insights to report. And I better be careful about making God into a product I’m selling. Image

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